For To Us

For a child will be born to us, a son will be given to us;

And the governent will rest on His shoulders. Isaiah 9:6

But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. ^11 Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ^a the Lord. ^12 This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”^13 Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, ^14 “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests.” Luke 2:10-14

As I reflect on Christmas past and the above passages; it is significant to me and it should be for all of us I think, that Jesus came for us. As Robert Lewis mentioned in Session 13, "we are the reason for the season."

Looking ahead to the second semester of Men's Fraternity, The Quest for Authentic Manhood, we will see specifically the teachings of Jesus and walk together in the "how to's" of becoming men who are transformed by the Savior. I can't wait. See you on Wed. January 10th.

Happy New Year!

Healing the Father Wound

I have been sharing with some of you my "father wound". My Dad, pictured here, was a fantastic provider and he helped to create many great memories for his family. Our travel trailering/camping trips which he planned were adventures that will always be remembered.

Nevertheless, I received a wound from Dad, one that stemmed from a disconnectedness. He really was never able to say "I love you", and was unable to tells us how he valued our individual gifts as boys and men.

During my Thanksgiving visits i continued to share my love for him, verbally and in caring for him, during our time together. One day, after i told him how much I love him, he said; "I love you". What a great blessing and gift he gave me that day.

I knew it was from God! I took the risk mentioned in "The Quest for Authentic Manhood" and received the blessing. I encourage you to do the same if your dad is still living.

If your dad is not around, here these words from Jesus , the Healer of our souls;
In the next two or three hours Jesus healed many from diseases, distress and evil spirits.To many of the blind he gave the gift of sight. Then he gave his answer; "Go back and tell John what you have just seen and heard:

The blind see,
The lame walk,
Lepers are cleased,
The deaf hear,
The dead are raised,
The wretched of the earth have God's salvation hospitality extended to them." Luke 7: 19- The Message

Jesus will heal your heart. You just need to ask Him and walk along The Way with other brothers who can lift you up in prayer. That is what "The Quest" is all about.

Plans for Manhood

Planning seems to one of God's ways. An oft quoted Bible verse tells us; For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 NLT

In Isaiah 53:10 we read more of God's planning; Still, it’s what God had in mind all along, to crush him with pain, the plan was that he give himself as an offering for sin so that he’d see life come from it—life, life, and more life. And God’s plan will deeply prosper through him. The Message

Through the prophet Jeremiah we learn that God makes plans. His plans are for our good, not for our ruin. We have been looking back into our wounds for the purpose of discovering the good He will make out of our pain. Through the prophet Isaiah we read of God's plan to redeem mankind.

Hmmm? I wonder if the work of putting our manhood plans in ink would please the God of plans? I kind of think so. How much progress are you making with your plan? He promises to make good out of your plan and that good will manifest itself in relationships.

I encourage you to let the ink flow to the paper. Get started. I did last week and things came out that were very encouraging and uplifting.

Mentoring

Session 10 of The Quest has stirred a great deal of reflection for me. During the morning small group gathering I had a hard time recalling if I ever had any mentors. As the day wore on, several men came to my mind and then I recognized the positive contribution they made to my life. Each guy had something signifcant to share with me and I really think the "pouring in" to my life happened quite naturally. It was through the "hanging out" that prinicples were transferred.

I am also reflecting on the mentoring that has occurred for my son Damon while he was here in Friday Harbor. Just the other day he mentioned the names of some men who gave him wisdom, encouragement, confidence and perseverence. Pictured you see Adam Stone next to Damon at the county fair. Adam was one of the men who took Damon under his wing for a time.

Thank you to all the men who invested in me and my son!

All this to say, mentoring is significant and it is one of the primary ways God can use us as men to pour into the life of a younger boy or man. I hope and pray as you scratch out your "manhood plan", that you will also consider how you might mentor a young boy or young man. Iron can't sharpen Iron without a touch point.

Salmon and the Journey

A couple of weeks ago I had the opportunity to observe salmon swimming up river in Issaquah with my family and friends. The salmon were headed upstream against the current to spawn. They are beautiful in the last days of life, a bright red crimson color that makes them very visible in the water.

Yet, when you really observe them closely, you see that their beauty is most noticeable at a distance. Upon closer look you notice that their bodies are deteriorating. The journey upstsream wears them out physically and they become susceptible to bacteria and fungi. Some of them really look quite gross in the last leg of their quest for the spawing grounds.

The salmon's life cycle lasts from three to seven years. Instinctively they are guided through the cycle from freshwater beginnings, to ocean living and back up the streams to die. It is the life process that it carried out for salmon, created by God.

Solomon ponders our life cycle this way in Ecclesiastes chapter 3.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal,

a time to tear down and a time to build,

We men are in a life journey with our Creator. Much like the salmon, we are in a life cycle. The beauty of this journey for us is that we have been given free will, intellect, emotions and God's Word for guidance and discernment to sense all that He has to offer. We have the mystery of uncertainity in that we don't know when our life season will end. We are left to TRUST our God, love Him with all our heart mind and soul. By His design, unlike the salmon, we are given the gift of relationships with others to pass on His love, acceptance and forgiveness; something that is everlasting.

Jesus makes this all possible for us and we get to take action, LOVE, for his glory.

The difficult truth for us humans (me) to come to grips with is that our bodies are slowly deteriorating much like the salmon. If I knew that my life cycle had an specific end point, (for example say 60 years), I wonder if I would live differently? What effect would that have on my life decisions? Would I be more understanding, more compassionate, more loving? Would I begin the "unpacking" process with a sense of urgency (develop my manhood plan), for the purpose of becoming the authentic man who lives a life of LOVE, GRACE and OBEDIENCE?

Your thoughts?

Uncertainity in Unpacking

We are almost to the end of October and entering into our 7th session of the Quest for Authentic Manhood. I am so thankful for the bunch of men God has joined together for this journey. It is a privilege for me to be part of the "Quest" and discover all that God has for me with these guys.

As we continue on, a degree of uncertainty seems to be lying just under the surface of this journey for me, and I think for some others. What are you doing with me Lord in this "unpacking"? Why Lord? These are important questions to ask of God and continuing asking. I think this message from Oswald Chambers is a good one that speaks to uncertainty.

Gracious Uncertainty…it has not yet been revealed what we shall be…-1 John 3:2

Our natural inclination is to be so precise- trying always to forecast accurately what will happen next-that we look upon uncertainty as a bad thing. We think that we must reach some predetermined goal, but that is not the nature of the spiritual life. The nature of the spiritual life is that we are certain in our uncertainty. Consequently, we do not put down roots. Our common sense says, "Well, what if I were in that circumstance?" We cannot presume to see ourselves in any circumstance in which we have never been.Certainty is the mark of the commonsense life-gracious uncertainty is the mark of the spiritual life. To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways, not knowing what tomorrow may bring. This is generally expressed with a sigh of sadness, but it should be an expression of breathless expectation. We are uncertain of the next step, but we are certain of God. As soon as we abandon ourselves to God and do the task He has placed closest to us, He begins to fill our lives with surprises. When we become simply a promoter or a defender of a particular belief, something within us dies. That is not believing God - it is only believing our belief about Him. Jesus said, "…unless you…become as little children…" (Matthew 18:3). The spiritual life is the life of a child. We are not uncertain of God, just uncertain of what He is going to do next. If our certainty is only in our beliefs, we develop a sense of self-righteousness, become overly critical, and are limited by the view that our beliefs are complete and settled. But when we have the right relationship with God, life is full of spontaneous, joyful uncertainty and expectancy. Jesus said, "…believe also in Me" (John 14:1), not, "Believe certain things about Me". Leave everything to Him and it will be gloriously and graciously uncertain how He will come in-but you can be certain that He will come. Remain faithful to Him.

Your thoughts?

Unpacking The Suitcase

As we enter the fall season of "The Quest for Authentic Manhood" it is a blessing to report that over 20 men are gathering together in the journey and locking arms to pursue all that God has for them in authentic manhood.

Right now we are all in the process of what Robert Lewis calls, "unpacking". The truth is, every man has a story. The story is referred to as his "suitcase". As our discussions begin in the process of "unpacking the suitcase", I find this tendency prevalent; life is running so fast, that it is easy to pass up the opportunity to "unpack". This is tragic, because it is in the "unpacking" that the healing process can begin and true freedom can be experienced.

I pray that we can set aside our fears and the pace of life so that "unpacking" takes place.

Socrates spoke these words to the jury in the court of Athens in the year 399 A.D. after he had been found guilty of heresy and sedition.

"The unexamined life is not worth living".

One Man's Story

I attended the barbecue where the Men’s Fraternity program was introduced to the men from churches in Friday Harbor. We viewed a DVD of Robert M. Lewis promoting the program, especially The Quest for Authentic Manhood series. Frankly, the title kind of put me off. I am 72 years old and gave my life to Christ when I was 18 years old in college. So I was thinking “I am pretty sure about my manhood!” But as I listened to Robert I realized he had some very practical ideas about how to improve family relations.

What really grabbed me was his three things fathers need to tell their sons which I understood to be; “I love you”, “You are good at …….” and “I am proud of you”. They really resonated with my life experience and recently I said those very things to my 40 year old son who had just told me that he and his wife were getting a divorce. He blamed himself and said he felt like a complete failure to his kids.

So if I am already doing this, I thought on the way home, why would I want to spend my time taking this course? It was then the Lord hit me between the eyes by revealing to me that I have a wife and a daughter I have never said that to! I couldn’t wait to find the chance to say those three things to them. I told each of them at an appropriate time and you must know they loved hearing it. And you also must know I will be taking the course.

Chuck VandeWetering
Friday Harbor

Building Foundations

In the Quest for Authentic Manhood this year we will be building a foundation for manhood, much like what Dave and Josh did with their rocket during our father/son BBQ outreach. Join us in building foundations that will leave legacies.

You Are Not Alone

Many of us have heard the Bible passage, "As Iron Sharpens Iron, so one man sharpens another", Proverbs 27:17

This passage suggests that we need each other. For us to be used in each others lives, we need to be connected. We need to understand that we are not alone.

Join us in the Quest. Discover you are not alone!

New Group Forming

Another group of men are joining together to embark on the journey in the Quest for Authentic Manhood. They will meet on Saturday mornings at Friday Harbor Presbyterian Church. Pancake breakfast is served at 7:00 a.m. and the study starts at 8:00 a.m. - 9:30 a.m.

In the picture, a brain trust of rocketeers seek the plans for building an atmosphere defying rocket at our men's BBQ outreach.

So far, close to 30 men are launching into the Quest each week. You are more than welcome to join us.

Men's Fraternity Launch

The Quest for Authentic Manhood begins on Wednesday Sept. 13th at Paideia School. Come check it out! Join us as we venture out of a life of wandering and wondering to discover a manhood plan. Two men's groups are forming. One group meets from 6 a.m. - 7:30 a.m., the other from 6 p.m. - 7:30 p.m.

Listen to what one pastor says about The Quest -

“Men’s Life, our weekly men’s event is modeled after the Men’s Fraternity curriculum and concept developed by Robert Lewis. I believe this may be the single most impactful event I’ve been involved in in 30 years of ministry. It is revolutionizing men’s lives and playing a signifi cant role in the transformation of our congregation. If you’re looking to kick-start your ministry, try this program!”

David Peterson, Senior PastorMemorial Drive Presbyterian Church, Houston, Texas

In the picture above, rocketeers Jack and Paul work together to build their rocket during our outreach BBQ for men. They are ready to launch into the Quest.